IMG_2718More than 800 of my close friends and colleagues joined me as the National Association of Therapeutic Schools and Programs held their annual conference in Tucson Arizona last week at the beautiful JW Marriott Starr Pass Resort. Even though the weather was unseasonably cold and by Friday morning snow restricted travel to the mountains, the crispness in the air only served to under gird the keynote address: Resilience.

Beth Terry, Resiliency Master posed the question: How do we hold our soul? Therein lies the key to our individual resilience said Terry. So then, what is this resilience really all about? Its not about whether or not things will go wrong, because they will; its about if you hold onto them for dear life or if you let them go, saying “oh, well” and find a way to solve the problem.

Seems to me there is a song in that somewhere… “Let it go, let it go!” Yes of course: Elsa in Disney’s Frozen. Elsa may be animated but the message is the same: holding on stifles our resilience.

Terry says we can master resilience. Sounds daunting? Not really. It comes down to being able to cope with our stressors in a positive way so that the inevitable bumps in the road do not derail us. Terry says it begins with finding your “golden temple”; your own place of peace.

Terry shared the qualities of resilient people: belief in self; detachment; support; reward; openness; focus; and vision. Of these, three resounded the loudest:

Detach – stop holding on and stop being jerked around;
Vision – change your perception and reprogram your brain; and,
Focus – be resourceful and get to the solution as fast as you can.

Be an encourager; tell the truth and be accountable Terry says. Where attention goes the energy flows. So don’t be the victim and define yourself as being negative. Get back on the horse; reframe your story; and dump the trash. Between today and the rest of your life is a blank slate; how you fill it is up to you.

Many thanks, Beth Terry, for setting us out on the road to master our resilience.